What Are You Currently Thinking

Like I said in the other thread, just relax. Don't get yourself sick over this. Eat a good meal, now and when you wake up, and get a good nights sleep.

I'm trying to calm down...it's somewhat working XD.

Drink some tea, and not overly caffeinated tea.

Eh, I'm over it now. Either I'm too tired to care anymore or reading that last chapter and having Ai and Ryuzaki feels helped :p

Ai and Ryuzaki feels

What?

When you have feels, it's like...it's like saying you have fangirl feelings over them. It's from tumblr.

Then just say fangirling :P Honestly do you think I know your tumblr language?

....you should know it. context clues.

XD

Well glad you liked it. I honestly didn't care for chapter 2, before the edits I mean.

I don't remember what happens in chapter 2. other than the battle.

Right that's about it, I just didn't like how it was set up and written. I mean I did write it well, just that it could had been so much better, like this edit.

Also things like Ai freaking out, getting her ankle crushed, and other unnecessary crap.

i dont remember any real Ai and Ryuzaki moments happening either...so...yeah.

now we get to see just how far their relationship's come :p

What do you mean by moments, like the relationships? Because they were there to, but crappy as well :P

yeah, moments. i mean, im sure they were there but obviously they weren't one of the more memorable ones. but whatever, this chapter helped me get through the rough draft of the next chapter of the Aftermath.

and im off to bed now btw.

Ok, good luck with your interview and sleep well!

Now the difficult parts of the next following chapters will be, chapter 4 when Lee and Rosso's fight is. Mainly because Lee has just been used as comic relief up to this point and I don't see much difference in chapter 3.

So the challenge will be getting him out of that comic relief shadow without seeming forced.

Then there's that problem with Ai and Ryuzaki and their whole emo conversation at the barracks. God I don't even know how I'm going to tackle the "I will kill Crimsonclaw" thing.

But I need to find a way, because revealing his ulterior motive so early isn't what I intend.

thanks btw.

I don't see what the problem with Lee would be. I mean, in a way, you'd be doing the same thing you did with Ryuzaki: everyone thinks he's just comic relief but in reality he's a good fighter as well. And that would emphasize the connection between Ryuzaki and Lee by having them undergo similar situations. I'm not saying you have to but I would keep in mind the parallels between the two when continuing. I think it's important to keep them parallel to one another.

Finding somewhere else to put the Crimsonclaw bit is going to be hard. Only because it's not a forgotten plot point, it's extremely important that he tells her that at one point or another. I would suggest Ryuzaki should insinuate more that Crimsonclaw is 'bad' and/or dangerous. This way, it will explain why Ai distances herself from Rosso in particular. But if you're going to go that route, I would have her still be doubtful, almost like she can't believe someone like Rosso is dangerous. This would then draw on the fact that Ryuzaki is actually the one that can't be trusted. And it would also keep the conversations Ryuzaki and Ai have about who you can trust, who you should trust, etc. into play.

Because the conversations about trust, I would say, have to stay to some degree. I mean, the progression of their relationship and their relationship to others pretty much revolves around what they said to one another at the very beginning of the RP.

The only other idea I can think of would be to have it where the wanted posters are in the village, Abarai shows Ryuzaki the posters, and Ryuzaki orders Abarai to have the posters removed. And then, while Ai was looking for Ryuzaki, she saw a poster and brings it to his attention. This way, he's pretty much forced to say why they shouldn't tell anyone else about it. And, it would explain why the posters weren't in the village in the first place especially considering they should have been. And, I'm not saying you should reveal all of this but have this as the 'story' and then reveal it as you want to.

I mean, those are the only things I can think of at the moment to get around the plot points.

I was also thinking of having the wanted flier, (which isn't posted in the village, just a fyi. It's straight from the Fire Nation and Abarai delivers the message to Ryuzaki.), being found by Ai some way.

Of course this would be way after their conversation and possibly the wilderness act. Like she would find it amongst Ryuzaki's possessions or something.

Yeah, I know it's not posted in the village; what I meant was, it SHOULD have been in the village. In all seriousness, we saw in season 1 that Fire Nation wanted posters were posted within whatever towns were occupied by the Fire Nation. So, if they're in a neutral territory, the posters should in theory be there somewhere. That's what I was getting at.

Ai would have to find the poster before the wilderness. If she finds it after, that would negate everything that happened in BaSingSe and after. The whole point of her confessing was that she was afraid to tell everyone because she knew about it before Rosso's death and could have, in theory, stopped it. But she didn't. Otherwise, there would be no reason for her to keep it a secret from the rest of the group if she discovered this information after the fact.

That's true, I'll think of something.

Damn your undeveloped characters! Damn them all to hell! Fortunately the fact isn't brought up until chapter 6 or whatever, so I have three more where I can just work with fixing the character reactions.

Lee, are you now going to quote Planet of the Apes every chance you get? :p

It's true though, the first few chapters is when we first began. It's so frustrating trying to think of sound, clever, and believable pieces/plots to add in place where some steaming crap was. There's only so much I can do when polishing a turd, no offense. Sometimes things need to be completely ripped out, but there's just no ripping this crimsonclaw thing.

Because in honesty it was something like "I'll give you something, to show you trust. I will kill CrimsonClaw!" Totally unnecessary and just to add unnecessary drama. It wasn't even built up.

To make matters worst, you and Ai never even heard of such a title and immediately put two together. "Why do you want to kill Rosso?"

Now wait a minute, where did this Rosso killing thing come from? I said Crimsonclaw.

Or Ryuzaki said something in desperation.

Why so depressed? Why so serious?

And then he goes on to explain he will kill someone. It's just a mess, ugh.

Hence why I always thought we were going to rip the RP apart when writing the fanfiction.

Isn't that what I am doing now? I just mean I'm kind of in a time constraint when I have to reveal this Rosso killing thing in some way. In one of the chapters soon, before he mentions it to Ai, there's a bit where Abarai hands him the Rosso flier.

I can't remember if I had details in it, or just that it seemed like an important piece of paper. Anyway this time it is Ryuzaki, but I thought I'd have him go to the alleyway meeting in a robe, closely similar to Areo's, so it seems like it's Areo being briefed.

The problem comes up with the talk at the barracks. Because right there and then it would completely throw Ryuzaki out into the open. That's what I'm trying to avoid.

It is what you're doing now, I'm saying we should have done this sooner as opposed to later. But whatever.

The whole bit really depends on what you want to go for. Do you want Ryuzaki to be a total innocent or do you want it to seem like ALL the characters have a bit of baggage in some way or form? This way, it's like the audience doesn't know who's the 'good' guy and who's the bad.

Say you do it this way: Let it be known at some point that Ryuzaki gets a flyer on Rosso. In order to give Lee more character development and less comic relief, reveal a little that he has a 'dark' side or a darker history than most would think. Now you also have Areo thrown into the picture. This way, you can make it seem as though Rosso is one of the hooded figures and that Ryuzaki is actually trying to stop her. But it's actually reversed. Add Areo and Lee into the mix and if you want, any other character, and now you've got it where the audience won't know who's 'good' and who's 'bad'.

It all depends on what YOU want to do. There are a number of ways to get around this obstacle. The problem is figuring out which one you think is going to ultimately help the story best. I can't fully help you with that because I don't know the ending or potential ending of the story. That's all on you. All I can tell you is to look at the themes that have been developing and get around the obstacle that fits the themes the best.

Well the whole idea is to focus on fixing the tournament arc section, so that Ryuzaki doesn't appear to be the enemy right away. Yeah making him innocent until the end where he is an enemy would be weak to. So I would have to land somewhere in between, where the line of who is good and bad are blurred. So what you suggested might work.